Tenomania.com

This morning, the magical Madeleine turns ten years old! It seems like only yesterday I was covered in spit-up, walking up and down our busy street, praying like crazy that anything, anything at all would help her settle down so we could all get some much needed sleep. I had no idea how much joy and happiness being the mother of such a wild, warm-hearted girl would bring me. Here’s my list of ways to love a 10 year old today and everyday as she enters a new chapter of her growing up adventure.

1. Put her at the head of the table

That’s right. Your girl has things to say and she needs an audience. By making sure she gets a turn now and then at the head of the table, you let her and your family know it’s totally okay for your girl to command the attention of a room. You’ll be surprised at how savvy she is and how much she has to say about things that matter to you, too.

2. Ask her to tell you her dreams and take notes

Inside every 35 year old mother is a ten year old girl trying to get out. Now is the time to give her hopes and aspirations full airtime–these tender dreams hold the keys to the truest version of her best self. Don’t be scared if she says she wants to be the next Hannah Montana touring the globe–little girl rock star dreams have more to do with the deep wish to be seen and respected than anything else.

3. Let her glory in every single moment of inflated self-confidence

Did she make the honor roll? Discover she can swim the length of the pool after all? Let her run with her happiness and pride as far as it will take her. Too often we encourage our girls to be demure and modest when a healthy dose of uber-confidence will take her so much further.

4. Ask other people to be quiet so she can finish her story

She’s chatty, I know, but wouldn’t you rather know every last thing on her heart instead of watch her sulk in the back of the car? Turn off your need to get her in line and take a turn listening to the twists and turn of her drama-loving life.

5. Indulge her promiscuous love of books

Turn her curiosity about grown-up things into a sophisticated knowledge of good literature. Now is the time to introduce her to the tried and true favorites of your own girlhood along with some new titles that will stretch her mind. This year Madeleine and I have had interesting talks about Iran and growing up during a revolution thanks to the brilliance of the Persepolis series (mother advisory required).

6. Turn up the music

It’s not my favorite thing to do, always preferring the goodness of NPR to any top 40 pop music torture, but nothing means more to Madeleine than five minutes of her favorite music blaring out the windows on the ride to the grocery store. I don’t understand it completely, but there’s a certain kind of joy for her in this that you just can’t duplicate anywhere else.

7. Remind her she doesn’t have to be in a hurry to grow up

She’s trying out her power moves, I know–groaning and moaning when you ask the simplest thing or waiting to see if you’ll lose it if she dares give you the eye roll. Don’t forget that underneath all that attitude is a little girl who probably still needs to sit on your lap, to have you brush out her hair or hold her every once in a while as she drifts gently off to sleep. Be bold in asking for hugs and insisting on tenderness between you in quiet moments. She needs it and you do, too.

8. Institute girls’ night out

Admit it, there’s a part of you that is dying to see the latest, greatest girl movie with all the cheese whiz and over-the-top acting. Here’s your chance to do girlhood all over again, so do it right by giving your girl all the things you missed the first time around–time alone with your mother learning what it means to be a girl from her unique perspective.

9. Be her best cover

She’s keenly aware of where your family rules fall in the continuum of lenient to strict in the kid stratosphere. Help her navigate the differences by being her best excuse when the invitations on the table feel inappropriate for your family’s sense of sensibility. The same works in reverse when she knows your invitation will be met with reserve by more cautious parents. Let her know you’ll help her not be embarrassed by the inevitable disconnects.

10. Dance with your girl like it’s 1999

She’ll love laughing at your moves and you’ll be delighted to learn as she shows you a thing or two. Let her see it’s okay to be silly, to not do it right and to let your heart go–especially for the sake of good-hearted fun.

What would have done your heart good at age 10? Add to our list in the comments below.

Rearing a child today is amongst one of the most difficult and challenging tasks. Habits learned during childhood are learned forever. how can you make sure that your precious child gets to learn  what he actually should?

1.Be a positive role model

If you’re practicing healthy habits, it’s a lot easier to convince children to do the same. 

2. Get the whole family active

Plan times for everyone to get moving together. Take walks, ride bikes, go swimming, garden or just play hide-and-seek outside. Everyone will benefit from the exercise and the time together. 

3. Limit TV, video game and computer time

These habits lead to a sedentary lifestyle and excessive snacking, which increase risks for obesity and cardiovascular disease.  

4. Encourage physical activities that children really enjoy

Every child is unique. Let children experiment with different activities until each finds something that he or she really loves doing. They’ll stick with it longer if they love it.  

5. Be supportive

Focus on the positive instead of the negative. Everyone likes to be praised for a job well done. Celebrate successes and help children and teens develop a good self-image.  

6. Set specific goals and limits

Such as one hour of physical activity a day or two desserts per week other than fruit. When goals are too abstract or limits too restrictive, the chance for success decreases.  

7. Don’t reward children with food

Candy and snacks as a reward encourage bad habits. Find other ways to celebrate good behavior.  

8. Make dinner time a family time

When everyone sits down together to eat, there’s less chance of children eating the wrong foods or snacking too much. Get the kids involved in cooking and planning meals. Everyone develops good eating habits together and the quality time with the family will be an added bonus.  

9. Make a game of reading food labels

The whole family will learn what’s good for their health and be more conscious of what they eat. It’s a habit that helps change behavior for a lifetime.  

10. Stay involved

Be an advocate for healthier children. Insist on good food choices at school. Make sure your children’s healthcare providers are monitoring cardiovascular indicators like BMI, blood pressure and cholesterol. Contact public officials on matters of the heart. Make your voice heard.

Having a great memory can help your child do better in school and on tests and get better grades. Here are 10 ways that you can use to help your child improve his/her memory, including remembering facts, concepts, ideas, formulas and more:

1. Make certain your child really understands the concept or formula he/she is required to memorize

Understanding a subject means that he/she is halfway to remembering it. Encourage your child to ask questions in class when he/she is unsure of an idea or fact.

2. To remember something such as a name or math formula, exactly, word for word, get your child to make a rhyme or song from the information

Because humans are wired to remember music and its associations, setting facts to music can help children remember them.

3. If they aren’t already, help your child become interested in the subject they need to memorize

Check out books, stories, videos, movies or music on the subject. Or visit a museum or gallery. If your child gets interested in the material he/she is learning, he/she will surely remember it more easily.

4. First thing’s first

Make sure the first thing that your child studies is the thing(s) he/she wants to remember the longest.

5. Whenever possible, encourage your child to use mental images to help him/her remember information

Suggest that your child close his/her eyes and get a picture in his/her mind of how the information looks in the textbook or notebook. Ask your child to visualize the notes on the page and see key words that he/she has underlined.

6. Have your child make his/her own examples and illustrations

When your child creates his/her own system for organization (using specific colors for headers, making numbered lists of facts to be memorized, putting information into charts and graphs, etc.) he or she will be more likely to remember the information.

7. Teach your child use a specific picture to represent an idea or concept

Another way is to create a mind map of various ideas and how they relate to one another.

8. Have your child make a list of key words to explain an idea or subject

Then, form associations among the items they need to memorize. The more distinct the associations, the easier they’ll be to remember.

9. Encourage your child to explain the information he/she is memorizing to a parent, sibling or friend without referring to notes

Make it a challenge to see how much he/she can remember. Then go back and study the information again and again to memorize it totally.

10. Make him find his flaws

Your child should study notes by reading them through from start to finish, then focusing on the parts that he/she doesn’t know as completely.